I'm taking this from a conversation I'm having on Facebook with a recent acquaintance. I love this conversation! Putting things down on paper (on computer?) helps me better shape what I believe, so I'm posting my contribution to the conversation here:
"BTW, I love this conversation. It's really beneficial to me, and I really love to think out and express my testimony. It gives me chance to reevaluate where I am, and helps me see what I need to improve on.
That being said, I'd like to preface my thoughts with this: Recognizing my attraction to other men has been the catalyst for me to question why I believe what I believe. I have had to be brutally honest with myself, and with the way that I've lived in the Church. I want to be as close to God as I can be, and so I do the best with the faculties I've been given.
I respectfully disagree with the idea that the Church is true or it isn't. I believe Joseph Smith saw what he saw, and I believe that he established a very true and good religion. I also believe that our Heavenly Father has a divine plan for all of his children, and the narrative of history seems to point to the idea that our Father provides all his children with truths according to what they are willing to receive. Essentially, I believe that the Church plays a vital role in the salvation of the human race, but I recognize the very real presence of God in other faiths.
I've never had to articulate why I believe things are true before, so I thank you for that opportunity. I judge what is true based off of spiritual confirmation of the scriptures, spiritual confirmation of other people witnessing to me, and common experience. Truth also leads to health, physical, spiritual, emotional, etc., so I take that into account too.
I guess feelings do play a role in how I determine things to be true. But I also use the faculties God has provided me to engage with what I feel. From my observation, that's when the Spirit steps in and carries me.
I factor in what the Prophets say and what the Scriptures say when mulling over truth. To answer your questions more fully, I think that I weigh self-evidence very heavily when determining truth. If what the Prophets and what the Scriptures are telling me seems insensitive, cruel, unfeeling, unreasonable or not self-evident, I do hold on to skepticism. That's where faith comes in though; I have faith in the Atonement, and I have faith in well-meaning servants of God throughout all ages.
I hope that fleshed out my perspectives for you! Thank you for this great conversation :)"
I feel really good about these thoughts... For now, they help me navigate the way I deal with Mormonism.
